been more certain in my life. Except

(continuing his thought)

Ha ha.

Gee, I hope they dont have a fight out

room. Grandma is sewing one of Maggies wedding veils. Walter

Oh, yeah. Scared the hell out of

BOB

IKE

going to wait to hear what the pros say.

smiles as she walks in the front door and puts down her tool box

that sells shampoo... Strong shampoo?

Good fact. Well, you let me know.

Theyre like Frankenstein monsters, but

the portrait)

MAGGIE

loved it. And Im down here to satisfy

IKE

maybe Vegas will give odds on her. Im

PEGGY

Docs Pharmacy. Third and Elm. Tell

Oh, I will.

(enjoying the moment)

a wash? You know, get all that city

dreams.

to Pete)

MAGGIE

him the special treatment that

She stops walking and turns to Ike.

Ike turns and puts the clipping up on the mirror.

INT. BEAUTY PARLOR - LATER

reputation and you screwed up my hair.

(sarcastically)

Ike peeks out from under his towel as Maggie continues.

MAGGIE

Thats okay, Grandma.

Id love to stay and chat, but Ive got

a bike.

Walter cracks up.

Bob, Walter, and Maggies GRANDMOTHER JULIA sit in the living

tickets. The dog, Sprout, sits in is basket.

and wets his hair. She grabs various hair coloring products.

MAGGIE (contd)

MAGGIE

to get back to work. I still have my

MRS. PRESSMAN

that way.

story. I made a mistake.

Maggie enters the parlor to see Ike smiling evilly from his seat

and puts it around Ike.

know Ive had too much to drink.

it the finishing touches九_九_藏_书_网. Then he sees his defaced newspaper

IKE (contd)

there. You dont think theyll call it

You chew men up, spit them out and

Dads fishing trip, Grandmas knee

Youll answer my questions?

going to run again. And Im not

GRANDMA JULIA

its red. I mean, I have no idea what

GRANDMA JULIA

So what do you think?

(seeing the portrait)

PETE

Hey, Pete, Ill be right with you.

Gotta tell you this about my daughter.

legs.

PEGGY

I have nothing to hide, Mr. Graham.

spine.

(putting on jacket;

Te family dog, Skipper, sits near a ceramic dog table. Maggie

onto the truth. Youre going to do the

Sorry.

Maggie walks away. Ike walks a few steps and stops at a KID on

Maggie indicates column to Peggy. She looks over at the part of

Ah, beautiful.

part -- I look down at my dress and

When Im wrong, Im wrong. I pushed a

No, shes talking about your hair.

operation, Grandmas birthday...

WALTER

Mrs. Pressman continues her story to Ike.

plans as they exit... Walter puts down his drink.

it means. Reds not my color!

Ike sits with a towel over his head as Peggy blow-dries the back

IKE

IKE

(to Peggy)

Peggy recovers his face, then continues to fuss with the hair

Cindy does her own nails as Mrs. Pressman scratches off lottery

MAGGIE

IKE

IKE (o.s.)

(removing his jacket)

Ike sits in the chair near the sink. Maggie shakes out a smock

IKE

ANGLE ON:

MAGGIE

snaps a look to Bob, who follows her.

Ike listens intently and stares steadily into her eywww.99lib.netes. Peggy

IKE (contd)

Weird dreams? Youre going to tell me

shows it to everyone. Ike does a slow burn.

IKE

apologize to your family.

MAGGIE

looks at his brightly colored hair.

on the couch.

IKE

WALTER

rises from his chair and primps the end of his hair as if giving

(sarcastically)

stunned.

your hat.

Im inside the church. Everyone I know

Excuse me, Pete, do you know a place

EXT. USA TODAY LOADING DOCK - DAY

PEGGY

job.

and bag.

IKE

Yeah. Lee at the hotel videos wedding.

him Pete sent you. Want my hat?

Mr. Graham.

MAGGIE

(good-natured)

Maggie nods affirmatively.

You have one?

She has a tape?

not be Hales longest running joke, but

Well, wedding cake freezes. This we

IKE

IKE

cabinet affixed to the wall above sink, which holds various

Because you cant make me feel bad.

Hey, kid, Ill give you ten bucks for

into town with his tail between his

IKE

Who?

MAGGIE

Hello, Maggie. I just came by to

is there, only theyre not really them.

mood as she walks right in the house.

he brought us a bottle of wine.

about them?

wont. He says shes so famous now,

questions.

MAGGIE

In another one...

IKE

IKE

They made me put my hat back on.

Ike hands Peggy his jacket. A mystified Peggy leads Ike to the

Thank you.

EXT. MAGGIES HOUSE - DUSK

WALTER

step forward toward Ike.

Youre going to be very disappointed.

Maggie takes the wine bottle from the table next to Walter. She

happiness, you might as well go back.

aromatherapy.

Kid agrees.九-九-藏-书-网 Ike puts the hat on and starts to cross the street.

No, no, you should have seen Skipper.

CLOSE ON: A tape. It reads: "Maggie I, II, III." Ikes

Great.

about reality?

My jacket, please.

actually stumble upon a fact or two.

(gets up to admire

Ike stares at his hair in total confusion. With icy calm, Ike

smiles stiffly, looking back at Ike. She then sits on the arm

Ill help you take into the kitchen.

Fine. You wash, Ill ask the

leaving until you do.

myself on that point.

Ike stares back at her, the tickle of suspicion creeping up his

clipping and all becomes clear. He picks up the article and

Peggy hands him his jacket.

PASSERSBY stare at Ikes hair and giggle.

Grandma cuts the thread and separates the veil from Ikes sleeve.

of his head. His back is to the mirror, his body faces Maggie.

So, what do you want to know?

If youre looking for Elm Street, its

already met.

grooms in the dust like that.

dyed orange and red.

Check on the crabs, Bob.

Ike checks on the tapes.

interest is more than piqued. Ike picks it up. They get up and

to make the hundred-yard dash.

IKE

I think youd look good in red.

EXT. MAIN STREET - DAY

It wasnt that funny.

Getting nervous?

MAGGIE

Walter gestures to a pile of video cassettes on the bookcase.

You know, when I only see one dog, I

He walks the other way.

tape.

removes the towel. His hair is divided into equal parts and

So, the forces of good and evil have

IKE

In front of beaut九_九_藏_书_网y salon, Maggie follows Ike out.

necks. Its all very "Night of the

Yes.

IKE (contd)

Maggie swivels his chair so that Ike faces the mirror. Ike

Raises the bottle to Maggie.

Thank you.

Living Dead". And heres the creepiest

newsstand, hes our local bookie, you

Ike smiles at Maggie and exits.

... Like such a lovely girl.

Yes. Conviction. Conviction that Im

MAGGIE (contd)

fired, lady. You destroyed my

WALTER

PETE, wearing a hat, comes in the front door of the salon.

Lets just put this back here for the

Like her mother.

drinks wine, Ike wears a hat.

MAGGIE

MAGGIE

Ike pulls the cloth down from over his face.

Have a seat. Peggy, why dont you give

I feel Im right about you. You got me

off...?

BOB

CUT TO:

WALTER

He stares at her for a beat, stung by her words.

Well see.

growling)

IKE

In other words -- hes only human. An

MRS. PRESSMAN

You know, your daughter seems...

shampoos and hair dyes. Maggie gets an idea. Maggie and Peggy

My daughter makes real good time, even

the shop used to wash and dye hair. Theres a sink, stool and a

know.

coloring products. Maggie helps.

MAGGIE

She puts on her sunglasses.

here for vindication. In my heart...

Well, instead of a haircut, how about

We overhear them murmuring in annoyed tones about the wedding

profile of the women of Hale.

IKE (contd)

IKE

Yes, I think I nailed the personality

same thing to "poor bastard number four"

IKE

Did something happen to make you care

MAGGIEｗｗw•9９lｉｂ.ｎｅｔ

He seems crabby.

IKE (contd)

WALTER

Skipper.

go to the dining room.

MAGGIE

Maggie pulls into the driveway in her truck. Shes in a fine

(innocently)

GRANDMA JULIA

grit out of it.

Youve got to be kidding me.

Youll never guess who came crawling

of Bobs chair and puts her arm on his shoulder.

Ike notices that hes been sewn to the veil.

in a long dress and heels. Maggie may

Maggie gives him a look that says, "You are not absolved." She

MAGGIE

I just cant see her leaving multiple

PEGGY

sink. While she does this...

Nervous? Not at all! No. Ive never

MAGGIE

Ike moves toward the door. He spots Pete.

Im not sure. Mr. Schullian runs the

WALTER

GRANDMA JULIA

IKE

strengthens the follicles.

that you did to the last three. Youre

Ike walks back to Maggie.

INT. MAGGIES HOUSE - DUSK

Talk to whoever you want. You might

without the bolts coming out of their

Walter points to a portrait painting on the wall.

Ike leans and rests his head on the sink. Peggy bends over him

she certainly is the fastest.

I mean Maggie didnt know she was going

An OLD WOMAN walks by and hits him with a newspaper. Ike is

Oh, yes, you can. Shes has em all on

DISSOLVE TO:

(calming)

IKE (contd)

(then, imitates

know, hes giving eight to one odds she

No thanks.

Youre all ready for football season,

Maggie stares at them both.

(to Peggy)

Im not here to make you feel bad. Im

If you came down here in the pursuit of

(looks to Walter)

-- I am having all kinds of weird